Why I Want to Marry Again: Real Service

Hello my very People

How are you doing?

Hope you are having a wonderful week.

Welcome (again) to this blog. Hope you are having a really nice time reading my thoughts. I love to always have feedback from you. The aim is to be continuously better, right?  Your comments do that to me. I am inspired to keep blogging and living right whenever I hear from you. Special thanks to those people that paid some of their debts by leaving comments in my last post. I really appreciate every word; written and spoken.

You know well (if you have been with me for some time) that the most common posts on this blog are relationship centred either with God, in marriage and with others. In fact, my most popular post is still Why I want to marry even after over 2 years of writing it. By the way, is there any course like Fundamentals of Human Relationships? Maybe I can apply for the course because the way I love relationship topics, I cannot explain. I may be thinking of getting a PhD in a course like that.

Anyway, I have always thought that marriage was synonymous with independence. Most of you already know my struggle with independence, right? Subconsciously, for a long time I always thought “I can't wait to marry and live my life with my husband in our pretty glass house and do whatever I want. Oh boy, like I will so enjoy myself.” Am I currently suffering or imprisoned or not enjoying myself? Please help me to answer this question o.

I was praying to God about my marriage a while ago, then I read 1 Corinthians 7:3-6 but the part I want to emphasise is "...Marriage is not a place to “stand up for your rights.” Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out..."(The Message Version)

I was also chatting with a newly married friend some months ago and I asked her, "What were the first things that you didn't see coming in marriage before you got married?" She responded to me very nicely and went on to talk about the level of service and role play she had encountered in her own marriage.

I completed reading a book some months ago by Gary L. Thomas called The Sacred Marriage; What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us More Holy Than to Make Us Happy (The books I am reading or have read in 2016 are on the top right side of this page. You can check them out or read any of them with me. You can also recommend a fantastic book). A quote in the book says "The duties of marriage calls us out of ourselves to help us remember that ours is not the only vision in the world". 

“Haba, after I have already left my parents' house with my troublesome siblings (they will finish me today), why does it have to still be interdependence on someone else” I thought. This service of a lifestyle is from toddler to death o. As a child, your parents can send you to bring things around the house and then as an adult, you still have the responsibility of service to God, spouse, parents, children, church, friends, nation and the world at large.

The reality is that if marriage is a place of service, why don't you and I (well this is for those of us single folks) start (or continue) serving  as a lifestyle. Well, actively practising service with our parents, siblings and friends will not be a bad idea rather than wanting to be independent and getting the shocker of our lives in marriage. Could it be one of the reasons for some problems in some marriages in our generation? Help me please to answer this other question too, I am just asking ni o.

My dear friend, Anu invited me to an event in April about relationships (I have had a post in draft since then waiting to be completed and published...covers face with palms). One of the speakers spoke about one of the ways of service in marriage as allowing your spouse to be anything they want to be and not trying to forcefully mould them to be what you want them to be. Chai, can service be that easy?  I am pretty sure that this service of a matter is in different levels; actions, words, and sacrifices. Simply just letting someone be themselves is one level and then denying yourself of your own comfort for someone else is also another level.

Anyway my beautiful people, have a wonderful rest of the week serving in the little and large ways you can.

Loads of hugs and kisses.

Miss Onakz...